You’ve Ruined My Life And Yet I Can’t Let You Go

**I have said it before, but this time of year is very difficult for people who are in recovery from an eating disorder, who are currently in their eating disorder, or are even in denial about anything eating disorder related.  Jess wrote this beautiful post about the abusive relationship between the person dealing with an…

Memories of a Brown House

I remember pulling in the driveway at the brown house…there were so many thoughts running through my head.  I was questioning if I was really sick enough to even be in residential treatment.  I stared at this front door.  It was a red door, and as I was staring at this door, it opened up,…

What I Wish I Could Tell My Friends About Eating Disorders 

**Thanks Jess for this post.  I think people get confused with eating disorders.  We aren’t vain people.  Keep rocking!** Eating disorders are not weight specific. Eating disorders are mental illnesses with physical consequences. The real damage happens inside our minds as we try to destroy ourselves from the inside out. It is the behaviors that…

Music During Recovery

**To say that I have been excited to get this post would be an understatement.  I absolutely adore the person who wrote this.  We have challenged ourselves outside of treatment, supported each other and stay in touch, as I do with most of my friends.  I know that music is important to her like it…

Ask Me About My Tattoo by Jess

  I have a tattoo of the NEDA symbol on the inside of my right wrist. I got this particular tattoo to remind me to choose recovery everyday. I got it in such a visible place so that I can lay eyes on it and it can serve as a visual reminder every time I…

Eating Disorder Treatment: A letter to my Favorite Nurse

***I have a beautiful letter written by a very beautiful person.  As I read this, it made me sad/happy.  I have developed the most amazing relationships with the people that I lived with in treatment.  This isn’t an easy read, it is a harsh, ripping the bandaid off kind of truth.  But that being said,…

Our Changing Bodies

No I’m not talking about puberty, I am talking about the changes our bodies go through during treatment.  When you end up gaining 30-35 pounds in less than 3 months, that is putting you in shock.  This is probably one of the main things that I hated.  During your stay in treatment, they won’t let…

Kirkwood Playlist

So my friends from treatment and I decided that we needed to have a playlist that either reminds us of the time we spent at Kirkwood or music that makes us think of each other.

When treatment is never a good time…

Going into treatment is not only a scary thing, but it never seems to be the right time.  I entered into McCallum Place on November 3rd,  and I discharged on January 27th.  What do I mean by the right time?  There are always holidays, special events, things, activities going on, and treatment doesn’t really stop…

Perks of Weight Gain

This post is also from Jess!  She does make some pretty valid points on weight gain!   This is for my Kirkwood family and anyone else who struggles with the idea of gaining weight. As women we are constantly bombarded by TV ads and Facebook groups trying to sell us items that promise to help…